French Silk Pie (aka THE BEST PIE IN THE WORLD)

I thought I’d give y’all a bakery update. It’s been a WHILE, right? Hopefully you’re following along on my Instagram account (@eatmebakerympls). I’ve started looking at bakery spaces, but the options are pretty limited. I’m holding out hope that something will come available in the next few months, but my opening date may be pushed out to 2024. I’m not panicking, so you shouldn’t either. The reality is that summer and fall markets last year kept me WAY too busy to even start my business plan, so I didn’t get started until late fall. Then, of course, the holidays hit, and I put everything on the backburner again as I not only fulfilled holiday orders but also spent time with friends and family. The business plan is now in its final stages, but definitely still needs some tweaking. I’ve had SO many people tell me that the secret to the projections in a business plan is to remember that they’re COMPLETELY MADE UP. The reality is that I have educated guesses AT BEST for projected sales. Shit is wild, y’all. People just be out there making shit up and opening businesses. CHAOS.

I’ll keep you updated as I start to look at more spaces. If you see any vacant spaces in your Minneapolis neighborhood, please shoot me an email or DM. If you’re a small business owner yourself, please email or DM me with any tips you’ve learned along the way.

In the meantime, I’ll keep baking delicious things and sometimes selling them. Unfortunately, French Silk Pie is not something I’m allowed to sell with the type of registration I have as a food seller. So if you see me posting about it, just know that I’m eating well that week. Maybe someday when I finally have a brick and mortar, I’ll start selling it. But I’ll probably never make my own crust. That shit needs to be outsourced, because we don’t fuck around with pie crust in this house. Except here. Oh, and here. But never again!

French Silk Pie is what dreams are made of. Really and truly. It doesn’t sit like a heavy brick in your stomach like a dense chocolate cake might. And it would never bloat you the way a pile of brownies does when you’re on your period and just cannot stop from shoveling them down your gullet*. No, French Silk Pie would never hurt you like that. It’s light and fluffy, topped with pillowy mountains of fresh whipped cream. It fulfills all my chocolate cravings without leaving me feeling sluggish and uncomfortable.

*To be fair, sometimes you NEED dense chocolatey goodness. I routinely make and sell and EAT chocolate cake and brownies. They’re delicious and necessary to a happy life.

Fun fact: When I was a teenager, my after school snack would often be a chocolate pudding cup that I’d mix with Cool Whip (aka cheap and easy French Silk Pie).

French Silk Pie (find the original here)

1 store bought pie crust (or make your own if you’re feeling ambitious)

1 cup heavy cream

226g semi-sweet chocolate chips (8 ounces)

4 eggs

1 cup (200g) sugar

3/4 cup (170g) butter (room temp)

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla

For the topping:

1 cup heavy cream

2 tablespoons powdered sugar

1/2 teaspoon vanilla

Chocolate curls for garnish (optional, but encouraged)

Bake the pie crust according to the directions on its packaging. Let fully cool. For the filling, whip the cream with the whisk attachment in a stand mixer until it forms stiff peaks. Set in fridge. Melt the chocolate either in a double boiler or in the microwave. We want easy, so choose the microwave. Heat in 20-30 second increments, stirring in between, until fully melted. Set aside. Mix eggs and sugar in a large mixing bowl and set over a boiling pot of water (double boiler). Make sure the boiling water does not touch the bottom of the bowl. Whisk continuously until it reaches 160 degrees (you’ll need a thermometer for this one…. I know, I’m sorry). Sally says this will take 10-11 minutes, but it took all of 5 minutes for me. I don’t know why. The most important thing here is to NOT STOP WHISKING. If you stop whisking, the eggs will cook and solidify. Once it reaches 160 degrees, remove from heat and set aside to cool for 10 minutes. Then add in the melted chocolate. Let cool another 10 minutes.

While its cooling, beat the butter with the paddle attachment until creamy, 1-2 minutes. Scrap down the bowl and add the vanilla. Beat for another 30 seconds. Once the chocolate mixture has cooled for 10 minutes, add to the butter mixture and beat for another 3 minutes. Fold in the whipped cream

Pour into the cooled pie crust and wrap with plastic wrap. Let set in the fridge for at least 4 hours, or overnight.

For the topping: Whisk all the ingredients in a stand mixer until medium peaks form (I overmixed mine, but it still tastes amazing). Spread over the pie and top with chocolate shavings (I used a vegetable peeler and a dark chocolate bar).

FACE PLANT IN IT. I only eat French Silk Pie now. It is my life.