Baking Without Pants – Maple Cinnamon Scones

Sometimes I bake when I’m anxious. I made these amazing maple cinnamon scones during one of those moments where I was twitching with energy. I was awaiting test results for my terminally ill cat, Harold. I had several hours to kill, so I did what I do best… I took off my pants and started baking (My cat was dying, and why the fuck should I wear pants in my own kitchen anyway?). There is something therapeutic about mixing ingredients and turning them into something else entirely. It calms the noise in my head, and makes me focus. So I started mixing everything together, kneading the dough, and cutting out lop-sided little triangles. I put everything in the oven, and sat on the floor to wait. Sitting on the floor is a habit leftover from childhood. When I’m sad, I don’t bother with chairs. And I already wasn’t wearing pants, so, I mean, really, who was I trying to impress?

While waiting for the scones to cool, I whisked up the maple glaze. I can never wait for them to cool before drizzling it over the tops, so you shouldn’t either. Be generous, as it is basically frosting, and super delicious. Then you need to eat one immediately, while still warm. Trust me.

There are no fancy rules for this recipe. You can’t possibly fuck it up. And the beautiful thing about it is that you can add whatever you want (blueberries, chocolate chips, nuts, etc). Seriously, go nuts. It is by far the best thing to bake while overwhelmed with anxiety, as almost no skill is required.

I did not get good news that day, but at least I had comfort food.

Maple Cinnamon Scones

1 tablespoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

5 tablespoons of unsalted butter (cold, cut into cubes)

3/4 cup heavy cream

2 cups flour

3 tablespoons maple syrup

Glaze

6 tablespoons powdered sugar

2 tablespoons maple syrup

dash of cinnamon

splash heavy cream

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Mix the flour, baking powder, and salt in large mixing bowl. Then toss in the cubed butter and mush with your hands (I guess you could use a food processor, if you’re fancy) until mostly mixed, but with coarse crumbs and some butter lumps remaining. Mix the maple syrup with the cream in a small bowl. Pour cream/syrup mixture in with other ingredients, and mix until dough forms. Empty onto a floured surface and knead for 5-10 seconds. Break into two equal halves, and roll into balls. Then slightly flatten each ball of dough onto the floured surface and cut into 8 wedges each. Evenly distribute them onto a grease cookie sheet and bake for 12-15 minutes, rotating halfway through. When they’re done, they will be light golden brown on top.

For the glaze, whisk together all the ingredients and drizzle over slight cooled (or not) scones. Maybe just eat a spoonful out of the bowl. Who is even looking? It’s fine.